Thursday, 27 March 2008

Seen One Black Cat, Seen Them All...


This has been an unusually long winter, and I can tell my cats are feeling it even more than I am. Baffled by why, four weeks after they gamboled around me while I mowed the lawn in a t-shirt, they are now stymied from outdoor pursuits by snow, hail and Arctic winds, they've been taking their frustration out on each other indoors.

The biggest victim of this (mostly) harmless tomfoolery is usually Pablo. Ralph and Shipley have never been huge supporters of their feral step-brother's naive anecdotes and reductive life philosophy, but Shipley is currently making Pablo's existence unusually difficult, jumping out on him from behind a variety of chairs, plant pots and cardboard boxes. In an attempt to keep Shipley at bay, Pablo has even developed a new war cry: a primal terror squawk straight out of one of Suffolk's deepest rain forests. This noise actually has nothing to do with war at all on his part (he's a rubber, not a fighter) but at least alerts me to Shipley's advances and gives me chance to banish the more confident (i.e. spoilt and obnoxious) cat to the garden for a three and a half minutes, until I feel guilty and let him back in and start massaging his scruff and telling him that I love him really.

Pablo generally gets on peaceably with the his step-siblings - including Ralph, so long as Pablo doesn't nick his seat, or the pair of them don't round a corner and come suddenly face to face - but there has been another innocent victim in all the recent maelstrom and that is The Bear. I am sure The Bear has never voluntarily attacked anybody, yet Pablo has recently become unnaturally afraid of him. This morning Pablo even let out his war cry when he bounded up the stairs at the sound of me opening the food drawer and was confronted with The Bear casually cleaning himself. The Bear's response to this was to lift a paw in slow-motion and offer a kind of "Eh?" expression. Shipley and The Bear don't look all that alike, so the only conclusion I can draw is that, hounded by Shipley (who, come to think of it, is very houndlike in many ways), Pablo has now modified his Scary Things I Must Avoid list from

1. Dust Busters
2. Doors
3. Short-Haired, Muscular Black Cats With Yappy Voices Who Scratch The Carpet A Lot.

to

1. Dust Busters
2. Doors
3. Every Short-Haired Black Cat In The Universe.

Pablo has come a long way since spring, 2005, when we picked him up from the local rescue centre, but his development has been physical and emotional, rather than intellectual. One only has to look at the picture above (circa summer 2005) or the cover of the book in the post below to realise that he is no feline Phd candidate. But is Pablo really so stupid that he believes Shipley and The Bear are the same cat? And does this make him the feline equivalent of a racist? Or is the battle between gingers and their darker-furred contemporaries an ideological one that stretches further and wider and longer than the mere confines of my house? This would suggest so.

Still, you've got to feel for the black cats in their historical plight. How many gingers do you hear of getting dismissed with witchy stereotyping, or being written off and consigned to a life of fading hope at the back of the rescue centre holding pens? Orange may be a colour that makes Shipley see red, but it has never been the colour of feline hardship.

Shipley:


The Bear:


N.B. That is not a black cat behind Pablo in the picture at the top; it is a cushion.

Just two months until my new book is published!


For more information, or to advance order with 34% off the cover price, click here.

Sunday, 23 March 2008

Fifteen?


This is Rita Mae Brown, author of fifteen detective novels in which a cat, Mrs Murphy, solves murders. Her most recent,
The Purr-fect Murder, is in stores now.

Fifteen?

Her credited co-author is her cat Sneaky Pie Brown; their other titles include Puss 'n' Cahoots and Whisker of Evil. Oh, and she also used to date Martina Navratilova. She clearly doesn't need the cat desk tray shown below; not if Sneaky Pie's doing all the typing anyway.

It's a common problem...

Cats napping on your keyboard all the live long day?

Why not place them on this handy tray? Sure, they'll stay put!

The Refined Feline: The swankiest cat furniture money can buy

Cat trapped in tree has fetching moustache shocker




Northern Colorado Tribune: Cat in Tree Nine Days

Saturday, 22 March 2008

Under The Paw - The Facebook Group


COME AND JOIN if you haven't already, and invite all your Facebook friends!

P.S. The link only works if you are already signed in as a Facebook member.

Thursday, 20 March 2008

RIP Max, the Avant-Garde Cat



New York: the city that never sleeps and has cinemas with their own cats (who, breaking with metropolitan custom, do sleep, usually for roughly seventy percent of the day). Sadly Max, the 17 year-old doyenne (yes, she was a she) of the Anthology Film Archives Cinema went to movie mog heaven this September, but her former home is now staging a special memorial season of eight avant-garde cat-themed movies in her memory. Bung a wig on that puss and she'd even look like the star of a Bunuel masterpiece.